The title of the post refers to the answer of the first question.Panchali ,you really set me to shuffle through pages rather literally raking the ashes and after a long time I was face to face with the lighted more than ignited pieces buried under the pile.
Whom do i look up to..................I don't know whether she is still there somewhere or not in the mortal sense but she is alive to me.I have not met or even heard of beejee after that disastrous incident of 1984.I knew beejee from my college days .Her home was enroute the circle of our colony from where we caught city buses to go to college and later to office.Beejee had a huge personality in all sense of term.sitting on the cot[whose major portion was occupied by her only] in front of her home ,busy in chopping and grating vegetables/salads ,knitting sweaters, she was connecting and bonding source of whole colony.Who is sick,whose money order from son has not yet reached,whose daughter is being harassed by her in.laws.....i mean problem of all type and of every body's was beejee's concern.She knew who is most suitable one to solve which problem and directed people to do so with or sometimes even without the knowledge of the suffering person.she exuded reassurance and security like a big shady banyan tree.
She lived there with her husband ,two sons and daughters in law and three grand children.all the three of elder son.We all are aware of the hell which consumed whole nation in it's spate in 1984.Our beejee's family fell victim to that insane,violent massacre.it was henious act of the mob which surged from nowhere.uncle and elder son who hid in the house were brutally murdered after the mob broke in and the younger one who ran outside trying to find shelter was burnt alive.the kids and beejee were already in a neighbours house attending some pooja ceremony and both the daughters in law were dragged by the only brave girl in the whole neighbourhood ,manju to her house.All others were inside their tightly closed shutters.The mob did not have any fire arms.They were armed with the insane frenzy and the lust of violance and barbaric thrill and our white collared neighbourhood watched the carnage with a sense of guilt and shame without even trying to putting up a front.
It was over within four five hours.Police chauki was at a stone throw but we all know the reality .They murdered ,they looted , broke and destroyed what they could not take.As my home was in another block ,I did not witness it but news reached us in the evening.No body ventured out.Next day police came to take the remaining members to camp.Beejee refused to go.She sent her daughters in law and grand children.The bodies of her husband and the elder son were taken by police but of younger son there was almost nothing remained to take.Beejee sat there near the ashes fondly caressing the ashes. She had seen from the glass window of first floor of the house her burning son running here and there ,crying for help.
I met her after a week of the incident.That much time was taken in settling down the things and creamation of bodies etc.She has not put a single morsel in her mouth during this period and has drunk water from corporation hand pump on the side of road.she has shunned the neighbourhood.forshakn them.The day I met her last she was leaving with her daughters in law and kids .women and kids of neighbourhood gathered there .Every body was weeping but beejee was dry eyed .Somebody ventured,' beejee kahan jaogi'.First time in days beejee opened her mouth ,'meri chinta mat karo.............ek bar partition ne jado se ukhad kar feka tha to yahan aa ke base the fir koi nayi jameen khoj lege.fir jade uga lege.she encircled her grand children in her arms threw a glance around and continued after a pause,'par tum log ka kya hoga hath oopar kare rahane se chhate nahi ban jate.'with that she walked away with her remaining family.
I know she must have created another home somewhere else.For last few days beejee's words are echoing in my heart with increasing volume.
I wanted to talk about two other women of undaunted courageous spirit who have greatly influenced my attitude towards life but may be some other time.
I know ,I am not playing the game by it's rule but I really don't feel like talking about any thing else at this moment .
sorry bhiku ,sorry panchali for taking the game off line .hope you will understand
WRITTEN IN dEC.2008
Whom do i look up to..................I don't know whether she is still there somewhere or not in the mortal sense but she is alive to me.I have not met or even heard of beejee after that disastrous incident of 1984.I knew beejee from my college days .Her home was enroute the circle of our colony from where we caught city buses to go to college and later to office.Beejee had a huge personality in all sense of term.sitting on the cot[whose major portion was occupied by her only] in front of her home ,busy in chopping and grating vegetables/salads ,knitting sweaters, she was connecting and bonding source of whole colony.Who is sick,whose money order from son has not yet reached,whose daughter is being harassed by her in.laws.....i mean problem of all type and of every body's was beejee's concern.She knew who is most suitable one to solve which problem and directed people to do so with or sometimes even without the knowledge of the suffering person.she exuded reassurance and security like a big shady banyan tree.
She lived there with her husband ,two sons and daughters in law and three grand children.all the three of elder son.We all are aware of the hell which consumed whole nation in it's spate in 1984.Our beejee's family fell victim to that insane,violent massacre.it was henious act of the mob which surged from nowhere.uncle and elder son who hid in the house were brutally murdered after the mob broke in and the younger one who ran outside trying to find shelter was burnt alive.the kids and beejee were already in a neighbours house attending some pooja ceremony and both the daughters in law were dragged by the only brave girl in the whole neighbourhood ,manju to her house.All others were inside their tightly closed shutters.The mob did not have any fire arms.They were armed with the insane frenzy and the lust of violance and barbaric thrill and our white collared neighbourhood watched the carnage with a sense of guilt and shame without even trying to putting up a front.
It was over within four five hours.Police chauki was at a stone throw but we all know the reality .They murdered ,they looted , broke and destroyed what they could not take.As my home was in another block ,I did not witness it but news reached us in the evening.No body ventured out.Next day police came to take the remaining members to camp.Beejee refused to go.She sent her daughters in law and grand children.The bodies of her husband and the elder son were taken by police but of younger son there was almost nothing remained to take.Beejee sat there near the ashes fondly caressing the ashes. She had seen from the glass window of first floor of the house her burning son running here and there ,crying for help.
I met her after a week of the incident.That much time was taken in settling down the things and creamation of bodies etc.She has not put a single morsel in her mouth during this period and has drunk water from corporation hand pump on the side of road.she has shunned the neighbourhood.forshakn them.The day I met her last she was leaving with her daughters in law and kids .women and kids of neighbourhood gathered there .Every body was weeping but beejee was dry eyed .Somebody ventured,' beejee kahan jaogi'.First time in days beejee opened her mouth ,'meri chinta mat karo.............ek bar partition ne jado se ukhad kar feka tha to yahan aa ke base the fir koi nayi jameen khoj lege.fir jade uga lege.she encircled her grand children in her arms threw a glance around and continued after a pause,'par tum log ka kya hoga hath oopar kare rahane se chhate nahi ban jate.'with that she walked away with her remaining family.
I know she must have created another home somewhere else.For last few days beejee's words are echoing in my heart with increasing volume.
I wanted to talk about two other women of undaunted courageous spirit who have greatly influenced my attitude towards life but may be some other time.
I know ,I am not playing the game by it's rule but I really don't feel like talking about any thing else at this moment .
sorry bhiku ,sorry panchali for taking the game off line .hope you will understand
WRITTEN IN dEC.2008
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