Without realizing it I burst out laughing because he had such a dumb struck expression on his face. He, a very successful marketing executive in a firm with booming business statistics, always busy in video conferencing, meeting with clients, tours, lost in the world of targets, figures and numbers. He suited his job to the hilt. Smart energetic, expert in multitasking, a point of attraction, almost a compulsory presence in social gatherings due to his wit humour and for having latest updates in almost every field, sports, music, politics, you name it.
As you would have guessed by now he had almost no time for mundane daily household problems but he was a doting father and a concerned son and son in law. Me, his wife could’nt have complained as he never held his purse string tight. I was free to take almost all the decisions at the domestic front from kids’ school tuition to parents’ doctor. He completely relied on my judgements on these issues. We had a very calm quiet domestic life during 10 years of our married life, a sort of compliancy has settled in our relationship. Though I was happy in my world, sometimes a misty wistfulness, a bubble of void tried to raise its head. We almost never spent those soft moments of togetherness full of sweet nothings. Well I was a bit dreamy type, always lost in the world of poetry and fiction during my college days, but I did not have the heart to bother him with my romantic whims and where was the time. He always came home so late, tired after long discussions and strategic meetings.
One day while I was rushing back to kitchen to make his morning cup of tea (he never preferred tea made by maid) after dropping kids to their school bus, I overheard him talking to somebody on phone, “yeah, sulekha has added that missing flavour in my life” I was rooted to the place. Who on gods name is this sulekha……..sensing an impending danger my hitherto dormant antenna instantly leapt into action. Fragments of conversation informed me, he was talking to his childhood friend nikhil. Nikhil is the last person I would expect to be an ally in any conspiracy effecting me adversely .Further bits of conversations revealed that they were perhaps talking about certain website .What kind of website it can be to provide him the missing flavour. Ripples of anxiety and curiosity had broken the calm, as I heard him coming inside, I went to the kitchen.
Though backed by an excellent academic record, exposed to atmosphere of esteemed public school, I had never been a technically inclined person .The magic world of global connectivity which have swept the generation off its feet could not attract me to its fold, but now I was craving to know more about it .Whom should I approach .What was the missing flavour …
As an answer to a unsaid prayer, one of the next door girls knocked at the door. Five girls working in software companies occupy the adjacent flat .Talking over a cup of tea I broached the topic and lo she was well aware of the site .In fact a member herself .She introduced me to this virtual world of blogging. I was fascinated, my own forgotten interests and skills started rumbling inside me as if to burst into creativity .So this was the missing flavour ….I knew that he has always been an avid reader, often heard him express his views and thoughts on various issues in a profound way but this urge of sharing …. …..I just thought he enjoyed his success in career front …may be that was one aspect and a very necessary one .After all he has a family to support .Perhaps I was so busy in moulding myself to fit the cast of an ideal mother, devoted wife and caring daughter in law that I missed noticing his restlessness .In turn he started taking me for granted. Somewhere in the mid we stopped exploring each other.
After few hits and miss on ‘city news feeds’ ,I was able to locate him .the name VEENUAALO ….struck chords of familiarity in me .
‘no ,for me you will not be Abhi ..its so common .every name like ABHILASH ,ABHINAV OR ABHIJIT has Abhi as a short .for me its Veenu for Abhinav .when did I last addressed him as Veenu or he called me Aalo .how and why we reverted back to abhinav and aloka .with increasing family responsibilities and burden of daily chores ,the romance acquired the back seat or flew away .i was always with him but why did he never let me feel it .all this time I felt he has stopped thinking me as an individual .
With fingers trembling with suppressed excitement ,I clicked the mouse .certain references and descriptions in few of the posts confirmed that it was him only .and then started a new kind of relationship .the comments ,the replies ,the views ,the interpretations started weaving the magic .sometimes it pained that he is not connecting to me but the RAINDROPS. At a number of times he restrained himself .i could almost feel the obvious silence .sometimes my ability to read his thoughts amazed him How could my interpretation match his so much but were those mine ,I just revived my power to read his mind .all this time I was driven by a new kind of energy .i was amazed by my own cool and power of managing the daily routine as meticulously as ever and still find time for my secret venture
And then came the day when we decided to meet at a restaurant to have a cup of coffee before going to attend the meet of local fellow bloggers since morning he was edgy .talking a bit louder ,getting irritated on breakfast table ….the conflict within him was almost palpable. after he left for office .i arranged the lunch on dinning table requested the watchman to escort the kids from school bus to building lift and informed ma-in law that I shall be going to meet one of my old friend ,who is visiting the city .everything taken care of ,I was on my own to get ready for my date with mr,veenuaalo .
I inspected myself before mirror .despite addition of few kilos ,I was still in shape .freshly shampooed hair gleamed with a healthy luster .baby pink saree with zaree border clung delicately .dangling earrings gave me a girlish look .colour of saree and matching beads added to freshness .a rose bud tucked in hair .i was surprised by the outcome .i was facing myself after a long interval .
I reached the appointed place .his back was towards door .i glided in .
Hi Veenu
He spun back with a jerk .
Myself raindrops
He was stumped .i burst out laughing .but slowly dawning appreciation and pleasure in his glance made me blush .
written in Feb.2008,Pune
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